I thought I should stop in and write a little post. Sometime's when we feel the least like writing and thinking is when we need to be writing out our thoughts. And that is how I feel today. In the past four days, I've probably gotten a collective 10 hours of sleep or so. I have been in constant endometriosis pain since Sunday morning. Not only does this pain confine me to a couch, bed or seat of some kind near and electric outlet for my heating pad; it is utterly exhausting. I'm sitting here with my heating pad on high, my coffee cup empty, pajamas still on and bags under my eyes; thinking about how to convince my doctor to prescribe me some new pain meds this afternoon. You know when you get so frustrated and there's nothing you can do to fix the problem so you just end up making a joke about it to make yourself feel better? That's the point I'm at today. I really honestly do not want to go into detail about the past few days and the pain I've been feeling, but I do want those of you who also deal with this pain to know that we're all dealing with this together and there is hope! I know, that doesn't sound like much when you're in the middle of a flare and all you can think about is making the pain stop, but there IS hope for us to have a better, less painful life.
Next week on Thursday, I will be undergoing my second laproscopic excision surgery. This one will be more invasive than the last, but I'm hoping and praying that it will resolve some of the symptoms I've been having for months now. The joy that I have felt when I think about being pain-free is indescribable.. I have felt pain in my body nearly every day since the age of twelve. I'm ready to feel human again. I'm ready to face this head-on. Ready for surgery. Ready for recovery. Ready for pain therapy. Ready to get back to living. And I am so ready to ditch Endometriosis. I know that my Endometriosis cannot be cured at this point. But I do believe, that there could be a cure out there and I have faith in the doctor's who are trying so hard to find it. Thank you to all my friends who have supported me through this last year; it means more to me than you could ever know. Thank you to those who are spreading awareness about Endometriosis, it is not a pain I would wish on anyone and I hope that we can one day find a cure and prevent it from ruining so many beautiful lives.